


Tide's Pull

by Xilizhra



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-08
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:40:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24609313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xilizhra/pseuds/Xilizhra
Summary: The cold of utter darkness lingers long after one has found the light.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Bellatrix Black Lestrange
Comments: 2
Kudos: 48





	Tide's Pull

**Author's Note:**

> First shot at writing this tag. Let's hope it's gone well!

Hermione sighed as she finished off the latest sheaf of paperwork, muttering vicious invective at the fiends who'd left her this much to do this early in the morning. The Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures could be an easy path... for some. For a profoundly stubborn woman who'd began as an elf liberationist and spiraled into exponentially more projects for reform as she uncovered each rotten layer of the midden heap that called itself wizarding British legal precedent... it was less so.

Now, her superiors--in particular Vane, a man she recalled first meeting in her third year alongside Macnair--had seen fit to shuffle those tasks that combined drudgery and importance, abusing the power of delegation to leave her entrapped in that which she could not dodge doing herself, lest their weight hang on her conscience. She growled, finally finishing off the last form as she checked her watch.

How lucky, only two hours late to her picnic with her wife.  
Hastily maneuvering the papers into their proper basket with her wand, she hurried out of the office and quickly Apparated to the beach.

As she arrived, she saw Bellatrix lying on a towel, a book sprawled across her exquisite corseted chest. Hermione smiled, feeling her heart swell at the sight, but abruptly frowned as she saw the set of her wife's lips and... damnation, was that a tear glistening on her cheek?

Abandoning any pretense of a quiet approach, Hermione hurried over to Bellatrix and pressed her into a tight hug from behind.  
"I'm so sorry, Bella, I was held up. Vane was riding me about goblin petitions and I had to do better than--" She cut herself off as Bellatrix turned herself around and buried her face in the younger woman's shoulder. "Bella, what's wrong?"

Bellatrix's reply didn't come for several seconds, and it was a low murmur when it did. "Dementors."

Panic shot through Hermione's heart. "What?! Did they come? Did they attack you?"

Bellatrix shook her head. "No, not their presence. Their memory. It feels sometimes..." She moved back out of Hermione's grip, squeezing her hand into what looked like an uncomfortably tight fist. "All I really remember is hatred. Hatred and obsession. I don't..." Her eyes began to shine brightly with tears again. "I loved Cissy, I even loved Andi. But Azkaban just... ate it all."

Taking a deep breath, Hermione took Bellatrix's hands, squeezing both. "You still remember how to love. You know that just as well as I do. There's me, isn't there? And you never left Narcissa... and even kept yourself from killing Tonks. For Andromeda." She smiled at her wife, with a confidence she hoped to project.

Bellatrix smiled shakily back, squeezing Hermione's hands in turn, and let out a shuddering breath. "For a moment... I was alone, and I just wondered if anything bad would happen if I just walked into the sea. To anyone, really. Wouldn't it just be healthier?"  
Upon seeing the surge of fear that crossed Hermione's face, Bellatrix raised a reassuring hand. "It's all right, pet. I know... it's just them. Just the voices of everyone who tried to destroy me." Her faint smile faded, and she looked down at the sand beneath her bare feet. "And everyone I destroyed."

Hermione nodded. So it wasn't one of the worse attacks, at least. "Neither of us can undo that, Bella. And the future we're building is for the people we hurt, first and foremost. But you're fighting for it as strongly as anyone."

Bellatrix giggled abruptly. "You more than me, I'm afraid, pet. You'll be the youngest Minister in British history, I guarantee it." She moved to squeeze Hermione's hand again, and the younger witch exhaled in reassurance at the feel of her no-longer-skeletal grasp.

"Never stop valuing yourself, love." She kissed her wife's lips, softly; there would be time enough for passion later. "You mean more to me than anyone could, and you are loved even beyond me. I promise."

The once-dark witch nodded, and planted another kiss on Hermione's lips, longer now and with more of the fire that animated Bellatrix on her good days. When she withdrew, her smile was genuine and held with it a tint of mischief. "Shall we have our picnic now, pet?"

"I'd like nothing more in any world."


End file.
